The Tale Of Two Selves: The Hare, The Tortoise and landing somewhere in between

Have you ever gone back to a place that represents a mark of a start to something in your life?

A stamp in the ground, the marker of an adventure, a new start, a change.

What did it feel like to go back to that place? 

How much have you changed?

Stayed the same?

A place where you spent time and a version of you showed up one way, absorbed so many experiences and upon returning you are markedly different.

I mentally liken it to revisiting your college or school. 

We show up with no idea of what adventures lie ahead and only upon returning and looking back can we see just the impact it had on us and who we’ve become.

I just had such an experience as we spent this past week in a small town outside of Bordeaux, France.

The first time we visited the area was summer of 2022. We were fresh into our first ever European Summer road trip and were coming off 4 weeks in Spain spent between San Sebastian and the Picos De Europa.

We were bright eyed and bushy tailed with the stars in our eyes that one has when you’re an early 30-something forging their own path around Europe for the first time.

Upon looking back we remember the highs of that time spent here the first time.

Scaling the Dune Di Pilat, the sunburns (even with sunscreen) because we didn’t reapply fast enough and sun bouncing off of sand really gets you quickly. We remembered the beautiful parks, the food (this is a food town friends!), and of course the wine. We remembered just happening to be here during the French Independence day and catching the fireworks show over the river.

We also remembered the lows like learning your lesson when you booked a non-air conditioned home in the middle of an unprecedented heat wave in the middle of July (and yes, we absolutely were not adapted to no-AC like most Americans but this heat was different).

When we reached the area for the first time almost two years later it felt markedly different.

Over the week we revisited a winery that was a favorite of our first trip and purchased the exact same bottle we did two years ago.

We returned to Nick’s favorite spot in the city and sat for a few hours over a beer reminiscing on all the things we’ve seen, done and felt over the past two years.

This time, we were in no rush. 

It’s truly wild how much a person can change yet stay the same.

It’s fascinating to experience a place you’ve been before. I no longer had the desire or need to do everything and could simply pick the few that brought the most joy previously.

Growing up my parents would buy me the scratch off world maps so I could track the countries I had visited. If you asked me ten years ago where I wanted to go, my simple answer would have been “everywhere”.

If you asked me today my list is much shorter (the world really is an enormous place) but more specific and sincere.

Now my travel list is centered around who I am, who I want to become, and what experiences will encourage the deeping of those things.

As we start our third road trip in Europe this coming Friday my list looks much more aligned to the humans we are:

• Staying in nature, the countryside, the wilderness with day trips or weekends planned to experience cities. For us, we find nature much more energizing and cities draining after a certain time.
• Choosing to book experiences like kayaking with jellyfish that glow in the dark at night (can you even?!)
• Exploring local businesses that have elements of the things we want to build in the next 5 years for inspiration

Just a short two years ago, you could have found me sprinting around Bourdeaux, wanting to eat everything, see everything, and do everything.

Today?

I’ll take a little more leisure, and just a few of the right things for me.

As we get older we start to appreciate the simpler things. We’d prefer to sit in a sunny, beautiful space we know we love and still experience the new but at a more intentional and thoughtful pace.

Side note: I have/had/may still bring to life a travel planning concept where you pick how you want to approach a new place. Are you a “hare” (aka let’s go!), “a tortoise” (nice and easy is best) or somewhere in between. Then it curates the best way to approach places. Would something like this appeal to you?

But here’s the thing: I wouldn’t have as much joy in the things I have found I love in this region if I hadn’t had those previous experiences.

There will always be FOMO in all facets of life.

We simply cannot do everything life has to offer. As life progresses and more responsibilities are added to our plates, it’s our responsibility to continuously ask ourselves:

“What are the things that I want to do that will bring me the most joy?”

And say no to the rest.

Even if it’s on everyone else’s bucket list. 

Only choose to climb the mountains you want to climb.

Climb them for no one else but yourself.